GUITAR BOY

Guitar boy

So I have just finished watching Bastard Okupe make a fool of himself as always on Channels television's program "Politics Today" and cannot help but comment. He tried as always to digress from most questions asked of him and tried in vain to downplay the significance of the stoning policy recommended by Patience Jonathan. 

Well the show ended abruptly following an unexpected communication failure with the Channels Tv studio where the media director of General Buhari's campaign was responding to questions on the proposed deployment of soldiers for the coming elections.  The host apologised for the break and informed the viewers that they were connecting to a live broadcast of an interactive session between the president and sycophantic showbiz individuals in Lagos. 

The broadcast commenced with Ras Kimono, Oritz Wiliki and another huge "Rasta" man singing for Jonathan.  They concluded by moving closer to Jonathan who joined them by attempting the "one leg up" reggae dance move. I understand that Sunny Ade had been on stage earlier and it was time for Richard Mofe-Damijo to invite Clint-da-drunk who came on stage with his right foot bare.  He told the audience that the shoe on his left leg was provided for by Jonathan's first tenure and he wanted the people to vote for Jonathan again so he could get the other shoe. To this Jimi Agbaje was captured laughing his head off; this is the fellow who was at the scene of the robbery attack on Thursday in a haste.

RMD went on to reel out the names of expired and current entertainers who were present there.  The next masquerade to occupy the stage was an afro spotting man in dark glasses with an electric guitar hanging from his shoulders.  It was Sir Victor  Uwaifo and he quickly rolled back the years with about 3 of his classic hits playing his guitar with majestic dexterity like he's always done even going down to one knee at a time.  The guitar boy ended by requesting that Jonathan should consider creating a ministry of entertainment so that one of them could become a minister. 

Victor Uwaifo didn't look like he had a strand of grey hair in his well groomed afro neither did he look anything like his age which is 73 just short of Fayose's mother's age (he's even older than Buhari). Is it not rather amazing that Okupe and his cohort continue to discredit Buhari because he's 72 yet there saw nothing out of place in having a 73 year old showcase the vitality which could still exist within the body of a septuagenarian. 

The comedian funny bone came next and announced that he was from Anambra  amongst other attempts at making good jokes.  The part which riled me the most came next and it was Gordons saying the most ridiculous things ever.  He started by saying that one of the candidates gunning for presidency was older than Nigeria.  I think he must have stopped in his tracks when he realised the folly of that remark.  He then went on to talk about Michael Jackson and Robert Kelly not having childhoods which accounted for their rather unpleasant histories. He linked this to Obasanjo and inferred that he didn't have paper to tear as a child hence the need to tear his PDP card in public view. The jokes didn't stop there as he made reference to Obasanjo picking a "fit" running mate for a sick man and linked it to the Buhari-Osinbajo ticket suggesting that it was perhaps from Obasanjo's playbook. Those in the auditorium including Agbaje and Mu’azu found these jokes very hilarious with some tearing up. 

Duncan mighty sang that Jonathan was the only president in the world who defeated Ebola and Waje clad in red came to justify her pay as well. KayCee had sung earlier failing to convince the president to dance to limpopo and then there was Timi Dakolo belting a duet rendition with the American idol Reuben Studdard. A campaign jingle featuring the regular Jonathan praise singers and folks like Akpororo and Niki Laoye then aired to which my wife commented "for food only ni àwon people yìí".

I don't know how and why I stumbled on PDP gatherings today broadcast on TV.  There was one earlier where professor Nebo said Jonathan had over performed and the FCT minister claimed he was cautioned by the president at a time to desist from demolishing a market along the airport road when he had not provided an alternative location for them.  Hmnn... During the program,  the compere asked the gathering to pick pieces of paper pasted under their seats.  It had the 2011 image of Jonathan in a T-shirt on it and they were all asked to rise, hold up the sheets of paper and recite together that Jonathan would win. The uncoordinated mummuring didn't seem to convince the compere so he asked for a repeat.  It still didn't sound right as the people didn't seem convinced at all by what they were asked to say;  my personal impression at least. 

If a 73 year old maestro and guitar boy can still exhibit undiminished skills dating over 50 years;  why should anyone doubt the capabilities of Buhari as an anti-corruption crusader?  Uwaifo was already a household name in the late 60s, I recall my father telling me of when he visited and thrilled students at his school in the 60s. I can still remember the dance moves showcased by my dad that day;  it was a really funny site. Victor Uwaifo entertained soldiers of the 3rd marine commando during the civil war when they made significant inroads into Biafran territory.  Should a certain voting bloc not retain bitter memories and anger at anyone who participated in or sympathised with the decimation and desecration of their homeland?  I don't think they know or remember this bit of the narrative. 

Age should not be a factor in this election.  Buhari is older than Nigeria so is Jonathan and the latter has proven beyond measure that this job is beyond him.  We should assist his redeployment back to Otueke or to wherever the rehabilitation centre for those who have brought Nigeria to her knees for the past few years will be sited. No "mammy water" can resist the inevitable change coming.