AND THE AWARD FOR BEST SCREENPLAY GOES TO…..

AND THE AWARD FOR BEST SCREENPLAY GOES TO…..

I paid attention to the review of today’s newspapers this morning on the radio and could not help but be captivated by the reports of two separate but related events about a town close to the Cameroon border called Gwoza. The first was about a woman who was allegedly released by Boko Haram. She was reported to have mentioned that Chibok girls were alive and well in Gwoza. From what I could infer, she suggested that the captives were in good spirit but mainly traumatized by the reality of captivity as just about every other aspect of their upkeep was well taken care of by the terrorists who provided them with water, firewood and even deodorant. She said she did not see them physically because they were in a separate and fenced building which was heavily guarded.

The “gentlemen” in Gwoza must really be a rare breed in contrast to the blood-thirsty and beheading ones who regularly upload heavy data videos of their stunts on Youtube and other internet sites. This has caused me to wonder why (from the second story) the president of the Federal Republic has commanded an onslaught and capture of Gwoza on or before Friday the 27th of March 2015. Does it not sound sensible if negotiation with deodorant supplying terrorists was considered before any recapturing move by the Nigerian Army? Is the president basing this directive solely on the intel supplied by this former prisoner considering the fact that only last week, he confessed to a BBC reporter in Abuja that he could not tell where the girls were and speculated that the majority of them could be held up somewhere in the Sambisa forest which is further inland from the Cameroon border? The president made this specific reference to Gwoza while addressing election monitors but did not appear to relate it to the information about the Chibok girls being there.

These two reports prompted me to take another listen to that interview granted to the BBC journalist Will Ross. Some people have found absolutely nothing wrong with the answers given by the president of Nigeria to the reporter’s questions but I am certain this particular interview and many others including media interactions have clearly exposed to Nigerians and the entire world that the Nation of Nigeria is governed by the worst case of incompetence and ineptitude.

The video of that interview commenced with Mr. Jonathan responding to a question confidently by expressing hope that the clampdown on insurgency would be concluded within 4 weeks. Mr. Ross appeared to me like a classic counter-punching boxer launching question after question before his opponent could embark on his usual merry-go-round attempts to digress from the subject of discussion. “Where are the Jihadist….where did they go?” was the next question and Jonathan still basking in the euphoria of his expressed 4 weeks hope, began to talk assertively about the free access of the insurgents through “West Africa into Central Africa and going to North Africa” utilizing his idiosyncratic upper limb gesticulations in the process. He also spoke about the escape and reintegration (he seems to like this word) of those terrorists who did not get killed on the battle fields back into the civilian population because they are Nigerians. I wonder how he knows all these information.

I find his response to the question about the statement made by the Chief of Army staff; Lieutenant General Kenneth Minimah regarding the absence of any trace of the 219 Chibok girls in any of the recovered territories very shocking. The president said “if that is what the military tells you then you have to take it”. Mr. Ross fired on asking him if he knew where the abducted girls were to which the president answered; “No,….I can’t tell you where they are……..We are suspecting that they may be in Sambisa forest. One cannot say categorically but we are suspecting that the bulk of them may be in Sambisa forest”. It sickens me when I hear him express his hope on the recovery of the Chibok girls by emphasizing on the absence of any photographs of dead girls. When a representative of the National civil defence corp and the president of the federation are using the same “categorically” terminology then we should indeed be worried.

When asked why the current onslaught could not have happened months or years ago, he began by expressing how he never expected the terrorists to build capacity and how he underrated the external influence. What external influence was he talking about? I thought his spokespersons have constantly gone to town to sound out how Boko Haram was the armed wing of the All Progressives’ Congress (APC) and how certain nationals were hell bent on making the country ungovernable for Mr. President.

That “making the country ungovernable” phrase has been severally and maliciously ascribed to the person of General Buhari and many bigoted Nigerians have run with this sentiment to doggedly resist his candidacy even if confronted with concrete evidence of the true source. A certain PDP chieftain Lawal Keita is generally agreed to have been the source of that statement during the height of resistance to Goodluck Jonathan’s candidacy in 2011 within the ranks of the PDP. Many were perhaps aggrieved that the Northern slot of 8 years earned by the late president Yar’adua was going to be usurped and really I think they were right to have been concerned considering the fact that a 2nd term for Jonathan would mean that the entire North of Nigeria would have only produced the president for just about 2 years out of 20 years of this current Republic. This rotational policy is only applicable to the ruling party. With the benefit of hindsight, I think we should have just allowed Turai Yar’adua to complete her husband’s tenure of two terms (I know that is very absurd) as it would have prevented the current fiasco that we have to endure for the past five years. Reuben Abati’s audition for his current role in the presidency was writing a script just after the April 2011 elections to label General Buhari as the instigator of the post-election violence. He managed to include a statement about the perpetrators of the violence making a segment of the country ungovernable. He got sued and after much persuasion by the incumbent to persuade Buhari to settle out of court; the new recruit at the time got off the hook and everything died down but the Jonathan brainwashing manual had already been published and much damage done.

Mr. President went on addressing the reasons for the delay by saying that “since after the civil war, we haven’t fought any war...” and “we don’t manufacture weapons”. I do not quite know if the ECOMOG engagements in Liberia and Sierra Leone of the 1990s were boys scout exhibitions. He makes it sound like Nigeria and Biafra finished the civil war on January 15th 1970 and dumped all their weapons into the Atlantic Ocean or buried them in the desert. Is he insinuating that our troops which formed the majority of ECOMOG fought with weapons paid for exclusively by external sources or simply used catapults and fireworks to intimidate and subdue the many rebel forces that maimed their kin for diamond fields? Why does he think that “we don’t manufacture weapons” is a “get out of jail free card”? It is completely devoid of logic for the president of the largest black nation on the earth to attempt to explain away why the nation with the largest economy in the land does not produce firing pins not to talk of fireworks. Many have laughed to scorn a proposal by the opposition candidate to restore the strength of the Naira. I got involved with some higher centres on Facebook debating the issue and one of the antagonists got asked a question by my younger brother who is an Economist and we never read anything from him again afterwards. My brother asked; “if South Africa with only 27% of our population can generate 67% of Nigeria’s output and an exchange rate of $1: 11ZAR, why is it inconceivable that $1 can equal 1Naira?” I guess he bailed on us.

Mr. Ross was not backing down and reeled out the close to 5billion USD yearly security budgets of the past governments; he asked how the nation’s weaponry got degraded and if looting of the security monies was the reason why the weaponry of the supposed “Giant of Africa” got so bad and non-existent. Jonathan was not comfortable at all at this point as he looked into the eyes of the unmoved Briton. “Information is that these things were not there...” said Jonathan. Using his left hand to touch his chest, he said “I was not in charge, I cannot speak for them”. Really…? So we should go and awaken Sani Abacha from his sleep to explain what happened or should I organize a world press conference to tell the world why the past governments since the civil war squandered humongous security budgets yearly allowing the defence system of Nigeria to undergo necrosis? 

Attempting to answer or digress from the question of looted security funds he said “I can’t say so.. I can’t say so, but what I can say is that it’s not as if government has done nothing..”; “Weapons are not packets of cigarettes”.  The reference to cigarettes in my opinion is tragic. Jonathan has a habit of belittling his audience with what I think is a perceived sense of superior wisdom. He feels compelled to educate anyone he is engaging because he has a title called “president” of somewhere. Telling Mr. Ross about how weapons cannot be purchased like an over-the-counter cough syrup is as irritating as that can get. Was he expecting a seasoned journalist to be blown away by the revelation that it takes time to order for and get delivered assault helicopters, armoured personnel carriers, long range artillery gear or missiles? It is just the same way he went on talking about West, Central and North Africa like he had exclusive rights to the map of Africa.

I want to assume that Mr. Ross must have felt some heat under his skin from the gaze he got from Mr. Jonathan during the exchange about weaponry. Jonathan had reclined in his chair and rubbed his chin repeatedly and any hint of a smile was long gone from his face. Ross went on to soft pedal and asked what he would say to the families of those who had lost loved ones as a result of the insurgency. Goodluck began by trying to sound sensitive saying “whatever goes wrong, I accept it. Whatever goes right I take the glory, I’m not shifting blames”. Is there really any glory left in all of this? Jonathan shifted in his seat and went on the offensive, stammering and accusing Mr. Ross of being hooked on to a particular opinion and not appreciating efforts at curbing the terrorists but Ross was having none of it and sparred with the president by mentioning again the number of the dead to his hearing. This prompted Jonathan to grimace and declare his deep seated pain whenever he hears of the death of any Nigerian terrorist, civilian or security personnel.

Mr. Ross finally asked Good luck Jonathan about his chances at the coming elections; “Can you win it?” to which GEJ responded rather arrogantly “I will surely win it”. When asked why he thought so, he went on and on about how his party had a strong and wide support base around the country. Regarding the reliability of the elections holding and the possible reaction of the key players he said “this government must end on the 29th of May” and “I have said it severally, anybody that loses election will go.” I hope he keeps his word.

How supposedly cerebral folks can remain unconcerned by the president signing a meagre 4billion Naira deal with ethnic militias and fundamentalists to guard oil installations is beyond me. How president Jonathan can get away with handing over 2 lucrative spots in the southwest to separatist leaders who are constantly canvassing for a Yoruba agenda and the emergence of an Oduduwa Republic is baffling beyond words can describe. This armed and now unshackled mob with an unpleasant history of sectarian and deadly violence went about in broad daylight supervised by Soldiers and Law enforcement agents brandishing shotguns and intimidating motorists on Lagos roads. This group and the other well-known warlords from the Niger Delta have suddenly become billionaires and have rendered the Navy and civil defence corp redundant. The money has not caused an earthquake in their bank accounts yet but they will surely be gearing up to fight for their entitlements, the manifestation of which is hinged on Jonathan returning for a second term. 

If we assume that Jonathan returns and these ragtag groups get their deals; who will guarantee oversight functions and ensure they indeed abide by the details of their contracts? Would the Odua People’s Congress not siphon the oil flowing through Mosimi to finance their secession from Nigeria and actualize their much publicized Yoruba agenda? As much as I advocate for Local and State Policing which should involve the incorporation of locals to do these specialized jobs; I will never subscribe to handing over important structures of national importance into the hands of individuals devoid of any allegiance to the federation and who feel they are entitled to their share of the national cake instead of having a sense of responsibility to the union and providing service for the greater good. 

I await the drama of tomorrow’s showdown at Gwoza. I pray the girls are recovered alive and well but I hope Mr. Jonathan has not earmarked this moment as a premier for any feature film aimed at improving his chances at the polls. Everything about Gwoza sounds to me like a script and if it is; the award for the best screenplay would surely have to go to Goodluck Jonathan. He has indeed meddled into too many aspects of this nation but this final plot I believe would shock even him and his “Kukere” dancing wife who seems to be obsessed with prisons lately.