APRIL'S FOOLED

APRIL'S FOOLED 

It is truly amazing that many have rushed to reflexly shower worship and glory upon the head of the outgoing accidental president Goodluck Jonathan because he dodged a moving train. Some have highlighted to me the fact that the president elect Buhari himself described Jonathan as a great Nigerian during the remarks he made after receiving his certificate of return.  Did they expect Buhari to get in front of cameras and start calling Jonathan names so that bigots can unsheath their blades all over again?  Anyway,  one can be great for good and bad reasons;  bad reasons such as stealing,  lying and incompetence. 

Mr Jonathan has suddenly been described most especially by his cronies and sections of the media and cyberspace as the hero of this electioneering period because he conceded before Borno results sealed the grave of this ill fated government.  How Jega "the White" can be usurped because some people want to salvage and rehabilitate the outgoing president is beyond me.  I have spoken to a few people that this issue of conceding and emerging as a hero is like watching a movie where a hostage taker is encouraged to free his hostages when he realises the SWAT team outside his position has him boxed in and with many red dots focused on him.  Unlike the normal movies where such a character would be taken away in handcuffs,  this character would be hailed by onlookers and the media with a helicopter provided to take him to any location of his choice. 

So what if he chose to grandstand and Orubebe succeeded in sparking a "Royal Rumble" on the collation stage of the International Conference Centre Abuja?  What if the regional militias that he has liberated with a 4 billion naira pipeline security contract decided to initiate armed conflicts?  Would he have just dissociated himself because he is the symbol of humility? Was it not common sense to have brought out a calculator to know way before hand if he still had a chance and concede if he did not have?  Certain combat sports such as the mixed martial arts have submissions as a method of earning victory.  When a combatant is held in a submission hold which he or she is not able to break out of;  it does not require any gram of heroism to tap out. How Jonathan was planning to win the election with victory in only 2 out of 6 regions defied logic; the scoreline flattered him and conceding was a no brainer. 

Assuming Jonathan is set free to walk,  what will he actually do with his life after May 29? Go back to teach? Publish his memoirs? Start a ministry?  Regroup with the PDP to form a more formidable opposition with the likes of KOWA, ADC, APA etc? Plan for another shot at the presidency in 2019? None of these options seem befitting for a former president of the largest black nation on earth.  Abdusalami Abubakar must have suggested to him that a pseudo-Elder statesman role made more sense.  That way,  Mr Jonathan could get call ups to broker peace between North and South Sudan or be the chief electoral monitor during Madagascar's next election.  Madam Patience  would be able to travel around with him then. I however doubt if he would be getting any high profile interview requests or speaking jobs; I am not sure he is highly thought of inside and outside these shores.

The husband of a woman who called a grown man brain dead and who asked for a stoning drive has now suddenly acquired "hero" status. Are we expected to acutely forget all the front page insults and fabricated stories to damage the image of the general because of a few tonsillar congratulations? Should we suddenly forget the manner of Lamido Sanusi's coup d'etat  and the notable times soldiers were scrambled unto the roads in several cities to either intimidate or suppress protesters?  

The very many elitist imaginary fence sitters and non-partisan observers are now identifying with the movement for change they could not risk joining because of the heavy fetters of ethnoreligious supremacy and bigotry.  Many of those paid to hourly fabricate lies to destroy the person of General Buhari are now preaching one Nigeria like they had not spent the last few months nuking the delicate fault lines which loosely adhere the component parts of our country.  There is a need to call these lot out now so that they can see clearly their folly and in order to prevent a relapse peradventure a new piper payer accidentally bursts on the scene again. 

What exactly would Patience Jonathan have to do after May 29? Definitely not sun bathing on the beach with Michelle Obama and Angela Merkel. Will Wike still call her mummy or will Bipi still look unto her for salvation? 

Agreed Mr Jonathan did the sensible thing to concede in injury time;  a sensible football team knows better to slow down their aggression and do damage limitation if they are getting walloped by another rampaging opponent. This thing is not rocket science or Messi scoring a hattrick against Elche. If Jonathan should be hailed as a legend or hero with respect to this election,  then  Asari Dokubo is Hercules while Gani Adams is Zeus for exhibiting incredible restraint keeping in view their unsigned 4 billion naira contract which I believe is sutured tightly to Jonathan getting reelected.

I chose not to be fooled this day by this anointing for statesmanship like it will restore the missing monies, territories and girls.

Just my opinion.